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Monday, July 18, 2011

Comic Book Haikus - June 2011 Issues

Fear Itself #3
Another "Worthy"
Giant meat tenderizer
Bucky fights Skadi

Avengers #14
Red Hulk fights The Thing
VH1 pop up issue
Face is tenderized

Avengers Academy #15
The kids are deployed
Striker isn't bullet proof
But he's still a douche

Fear Itself: The Home Front #3
More useless stories
Speedball bounces Juggernaut
Now to Attuma

Fear Itself: The Deep #1
Namor gets beaten
Little green guys summon help
Silver Surfer yay!

Herc #4
People are crazy
Griffen wins over two dogs
Tentacles and trees

Invincible Iron Man #505
Grey Gargoyle in France
Detroit Steel to the rescue! much for that

Secret Avengers #14
Mostly origin
Motivational speaker
Valkyrie is not

Avengers Academy #14.1
More kids from Osborn
Chick with a zit for a head
Named Ruby Thursday

New Avengers #13
Mockingbird's okay
Ms. Marvel gets some payback
A Fistball Special

Heroes For Hire #8
Spidey fights raptors
Paladin tweets Satana
Misty in the field

Moon Knight #2
Entered a strip club
All dressed up as Spider-man
With Wolverine claws

Silver Surfer #5
The Heralds make out
Silver Surfer is now free he isn't

Astonishing X-men #39
Fin Fang Foom is down
It's off to Monster Island
A cave of monsters

Generation Hope #8
When choosing code names
Then go with badassery
Velocidad! Si!

New Mutants #26

Secret hobo code
New Mutants vs. Mutates
Fear the Sugar man

Uncanny X-Force #11

Deadpool bets 10 bucks
This is a stupid idea
Nobody took it

Uncanny X-men #538
Kitty gets some help
Colossus must be happy
The space suit is gone!

Uncanny X-men #539

Hope gets abducted
Crimson Commando looks bad
Hope likes green hoodies

X-Factor #220
A demon in church
Eye tentacles in the mouth
Hey look! It's Feral

X-Factor #221
Rabid demon dog
Shatterstar gets flashed by Rahne
Feral talks some shit

X-men #12

New mutant leader
Iceman wears boots and undies
Does he get shrinkage?

X-men #13
They're hiding Cyclops
He can take all New X-men
Starting with Rockslide

X-men Legacy #250
6 parts of Legion
Are loose all over the world
Creepy needle guy

X-men Legacy #251
More parts of Legion
Frenzy rips off a doll head
And kisses Gambit

X-men: Prelude to Schism #3
Cyclops history
Cyclops makes his decision
It took three issues

X-men: Prelude to Schism #4
I'll say this out loud
"Let's end this mini-series"
All right! It came true!

Wolverine #10
Ape man that kicks rocks
Revenge of the Red Right Hand
Wolverine is pissed

Wolverine #11
S & M lady
With spikey balls in her hair
Logan's still coming

X-23 #11
The girls go shopping
Using Logan's credit card
Gambit does nothing

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